The time has come to bid Eau Claire, Wisconsin farewell. After 27 years, I am moving back to Utah. I am excited, sad and a little unsure about it all. Totally excited to FINALLY be going home. I have longed for, prayed for and petitioned for this day for many years. I never thought I'd be here this long. I expected 5 years maybe. I'm excited to be able to see nieces and nephews when they are newborns instead of preschoolers. I'm excited to climb the mountains. I am excited to see the temple daily. And I'm excited to get to know my siblings as adults.
I'm sad to leave beautiful Eau Claire; the green green grass that I don't have to water; the variety of trees that develop beautiful vibrant colors in the fall; and all the many friends I have made here over the years. I am mostly sad that I will leave one of my children here. He may be grown up and I may not see him more than 2 minutes a week from a distance, but at least I see him. This area of the country has become part of me. I have lived here longer than I have ever lived anywhere else. I raised my family here. When I speak of family I know I will envision my life back in Eau Claire. I won't miss the winters though!
Having been away from the close ties of family for so long, I am leery about the reunion. What will life be like after the honeymoon period is over? Every time I visit my family, I get to a point that I just want to go home, but I've never had a home in Utah to go to. I want to do my own thing, clean my own house, cook my own meals or go out. I get tired and frustrated. Every day seems like such a hassle and it takes FOREVER do anything. I try to be patient. I remind myself that they all have little ones to get ready and I don't, but it feels like things move at a very viscous pace.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Winding up and down and limbo
The garden is winding down. I was given some watermelon plants this year and took a chance and planted them kind of late in the year. I hoped to get MAYBE one, hopefully two eatable watermelon out of them. Well, tonight I went and harvested 5 nice sized melons. The biggest and heaviest one fell out of my arms and split in two when it hit the ground. It's beautiful red color begged me not to leave it there. It had landed on the rind, so I decided it was salvageable. Boy am I glad I brought it home. I haven't tasted a watermelon so sweet in years! It's as sweet and sticky as candy. I hope the other 3 are just as good. I took one to the neighbor and he said he'd be willing to take a chance on a garden watermelon. It's always a gamble for me. I can never tell if it sounds hallow when I know on watermelon; they all sound the same.
As the garden winds down, school and work are winding up. I guess gearing up is the correct phrase but it doesn't go with winding up and down.
I usually get a couple calls to substitute teach about a month after school starts. This year I started working the second day of school. Then I got a couple calls directly from the teachers asking if I could work which lead to being in the right place at the right time and getting more jobs. One of which was a full on, full day teaching job. I was so apprehensive about it but it turned out okay. Only one student took advantage of the situation but he turned it around by the time I had him at the end of the day. The worst part about being a sub for me is not knowing the students names. It makes it really hard to call on students so I end up doing all the talking. I hate that. The students don't learn nearly as much when the teacher does all the talking.
This summer I learned my ex had moved to Texas. To test it, because the source is not the most honest person, I sent him a large envelope with some paperwork. I sent it certified and restricted, which means only the person it is addressed to can sign for it. I sent the envelope was sent to his last known address and the post office immediately forwarded it to Texas. He was given 2 notices that it was at the post office and he had 15 days to pick it up. He never picked it up and it was sent back to me. Next, I talked to a lawyer to find out what my options were. After a bit of a conversation, he said I would need to comply with the court order, which is to send notice to my ex stating when and where I am moving, file the same notice with the clerk of court and then go; move; pack up. So last Friday I sent another certified, restricted notice to my ex at the last known address. I had to wait until Monday to file with the clerk of courts because they close at 3:00 pm. (I got off work at 2:45 that day). Now I wait. Wait for the envelope to either be picked up or returned to me. The first notice has been given. If it isn't picked up, it will be sent back to me on October 10. I should know by October 12 if I am free to move. Everyday I have little anxiety attacks out of what seems like nowhere. Then I realize I am thinking of that envelope sitting in the post office in Whitehall, and hoping and praying that he doesn't pick it up and it is returned to me on October 10. In the meantime, I'll close down my garden, work and finish a quilt or two for charity. Oh ya, and pack my house and 30 years of stuff.
Anyone know what to do with an old, not gonna move it, couch and chair? They are trash, not fit for human use (but the mouse/mice sure loved them!)
As the garden winds down, school and work are winding up. I guess gearing up is the correct phrase but it doesn't go with winding up and down.
I usually get a couple calls to substitute teach about a month after school starts. This year I started working the second day of school. Then I got a couple calls directly from the teachers asking if I could work which lead to being in the right place at the right time and getting more jobs. One of which was a full on, full day teaching job. I was so apprehensive about it but it turned out okay. Only one student took advantage of the situation but he turned it around by the time I had him at the end of the day. The worst part about being a sub for me is not knowing the students names. It makes it really hard to call on students so I end up doing all the talking. I hate that. The students don't learn nearly as much when the teacher does all the talking.
This summer I learned my ex had moved to Texas. To test it, because the source is not the most honest person, I sent him a large envelope with some paperwork. I sent it certified and restricted, which means only the person it is addressed to can sign for it. I sent the envelope was sent to his last known address and the post office immediately forwarded it to Texas. He was given 2 notices that it was at the post office and he had 15 days to pick it up. He never picked it up and it was sent back to me. Next, I talked to a lawyer to find out what my options were. After a bit of a conversation, he said I would need to comply with the court order, which is to send notice to my ex stating when and where I am moving, file the same notice with the clerk of court and then go; move; pack up. So last Friday I sent another certified, restricted notice to my ex at the last known address. I had to wait until Monday to file with the clerk of courts because they close at 3:00 pm. (I got off work at 2:45 that day). Now I wait. Wait for the envelope to either be picked up or returned to me. The first notice has been given. If it isn't picked up, it will be sent back to me on October 10. I should know by October 12 if I am free to move. Everyday I have little anxiety attacks out of what seems like nowhere. Then I realize I am thinking of that envelope sitting in the post office in Whitehall, and hoping and praying that he doesn't pick it up and it is returned to me on October 10. In the meantime, I'll close down my garden, work and finish a quilt or two for charity. Oh ya, and pack my house and 30 years of stuff.
Anyone know what to do with an old, not gonna move it, couch and chair? They are trash, not fit for human use (but the mouse/mice sure loved them!)
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Garden journal
As the 2012 garden season winds down, I have been thinking of all the things I've learned about gardening. One thing that I think has really had a huge impact on my thinking this year is the fact that fewer and fewer people are gardening as a way of sustaining themselves through the winter. Gardens seem to be getting smaller and fewer people are preserving what they harvest. I told my son just the other day as I prepared the beans for the canner, that he was going to have to learn how to can the produce from the garden because chances are, his wife will not know how.
So, what I have learned so far; Each person needs 100 square feet of garden to produce enough to eat through the winter; planting a few seeds of corn at a time instead of the whole packet at once is a lot easier to manage at harvest time. (I had to replant my corn 3 times this summer because only a few seeds sprouted each time. Now, at harvest time, I have picked a few ears of corn at a time. Just enough to eat and process without becoming overwhelmed.) 70 seeds of beans produces just about enough beans for me for the winter. My colander full of prepared beans is enough for the 9 jars in the canner. Don't plant the winter squash next to the beans unless you have a really sturdy support for your beans. Next year I will plant the 3 sisters (winter squash, corn, and beans) in just that order to help reduce the squash bugs and bean beetles and keep the squash from growing up the bean supports.
And lastly, 32 pepper plants are a lot of plants! Nathan is experimenting with pepper seeds this year. He wants to see if the packet is right when it says the peppers will be ready in so many days. He is really enjoying the plants. He recorded the days of germination for each one. He waters them faithfully, and checks on them 2-3 times a day; Just to see what the flowers look like, how big the peppers are and compare the size of the plants. (there are supposed to be 5 kinds of peppers in the packet.) He says they are "more fun that a pet" and calls them his "babies. " He says it will be hard to pull up the plants this fall.
So, what I have learned so far; Each person needs 100 square feet of garden to produce enough to eat through the winter; planting a few seeds of corn at a time instead of the whole packet at once is a lot easier to manage at harvest time. (I had to replant my corn 3 times this summer because only a few seeds sprouted each time. Now, at harvest time, I have picked a few ears of corn at a time. Just enough to eat and process without becoming overwhelmed.) 70 seeds of beans produces just about enough beans for me for the winter. My colander full of prepared beans is enough for the 9 jars in the canner. Don't plant the winter squash next to the beans unless you have a really sturdy support for your beans. Next year I will plant the 3 sisters (winter squash, corn, and beans) in just that order to help reduce the squash bugs and bean beetles and keep the squash from growing up the bean supports.
And lastly, 32 pepper plants are a lot of plants! Nathan is experimenting with pepper seeds this year. He wants to see if the packet is right when it says the peppers will be ready in so many days. He is really enjoying the plants. He recorded the days of germination for each one. He waters them faithfully, and checks on them 2-3 times a day; Just to see what the flowers look like, how big the peppers are and compare the size of the plants. (there are supposed to be 5 kinds of peppers in the packet.) He says they are "more fun that a pet" and calls them his "babies. " He says it will be hard to pull up the plants this fall.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Just a couple of random thoughts
The other day I was watching a popular talk show when one of the guests said, talking about taking care of her children, "I've always done it on my own, he was never around to help." She was lamenting the fact that her now ex-husband was never around and she had to care for the children and house by herself but she didn't "get rid" of her husband earlier because she didn't want to be alone. The realization was, she WAS alone; all those years she was still married to her husband she was alone, because he was never there.
For the past couple of years I have been lamenting the fact that I am now all alone. I have no husband anymore. Like the woman on the talk show, my ex-husband was never around either. I took care of the house and the kids all by myself. I have been almost paralyzed since the divorce, trying to understanding how to move forward without a husband; without being married. How do I do my job and his? What is my job? What was his? Well, wake up! I don't have to wonder anymore. I just keep doing what I have always done. I keep taking care of the kids and the house...by myself, like I have always done. The jobs that he did do...he called/paid someone to do. I CAN DO THAT! I think painting the house last weekend helped me come to this understanding too.
Next thought: This morning I went downstairs to find Nathan watching the History channel. (One of his favorite channels) The topic of the show was the history of wheat and bread. The host described all the different kinds of wheat. Where it is grown, and what kinds of products are typically made from the flour ground from the different types of wheat. We learned about Italian pasta, breads, crackers, and pastries. Then all of a sudden, Nathan jumps up off the couch and says, "This makes me want to make some bread. Will you help me." I said I would, and warned him it would take hours and that bread is not an easy thing to make. He assured me he didn't care. He really wanted to make some bread. So we did. He got out my old green cookbook from the 1950's and searched for "yeast bread." We made the first recipe he came to. After kneading the dough for 5 out of the 10 minutes required, he concluded that a baker must be pretty buff because of the muscles used kneading all those loaves of bread in the bakery everyday. As the loaf was rising, he said he likes cooking and his new hobby is making bread. Oh Boy! We started around 10:00 this morning and ate our first slices of Crusty French Bread around 2:00 this afternoon. It was worth the work.
For the past couple of years I have been lamenting the fact that I am now all alone. I have no husband anymore. Like the woman on the talk show, my ex-husband was never around either. I took care of the house and the kids all by myself. I have been almost paralyzed since the divorce, trying to understanding how to move forward without a husband; without being married. How do I do my job and his? What is my job? What was his? Well, wake up! I don't have to wonder anymore. I just keep doing what I have always done. I keep taking care of the kids and the house...by myself, like I have always done. The jobs that he did do...he called/paid someone to do. I CAN DO THAT! I think painting the house last weekend helped me come to this understanding too.
Next thought: This morning I went downstairs to find Nathan watching the History channel. (One of his favorite channels) The topic of the show was the history of wheat and bread. The host described all the different kinds of wheat. Where it is grown, and what kinds of products are typically made from the flour ground from the different types of wheat. We learned about Italian pasta, breads, crackers, and pastries. Then all of a sudden, Nathan jumps up off the couch and says, "This makes me want to make some bread. Will you help me." I said I would, and warned him it would take hours and that bread is not an easy thing to make. He assured me he didn't care. He really wanted to make some bread. So we did. He got out my old green cookbook from the 1950's and searched for "yeast bread." We made the first recipe he came to. After kneading the dough for 5 out of the 10 minutes required, he concluded that a baker must be pretty buff because of the muscles used kneading all those loaves of bread in the bakery everyday. As the loaf was rising, he said he likes cooking and his new hobby is making bread. Oh Boy! We started around 10:00 this morning and ate our first slices of Crusty French Bread around 2:00 this afternoon. It was worth the work.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
My Plan
Today I started a program with the student's today to help our study hall be a quiet place where the students can work. I know today was the honeymoon, but they were perfect. They received all 10 points for the day. I still need to tweek it. They get too many chances to behave before they get a strike against them. I have talked to a couple of people and they agree that 3 strikes is plenty of chances per day. The fifth graders are old enough to know what is expected of them. They don't need warnings before they get a strike. Heck, they get 3 strikes a day-that's plenty of chances.
At the end of the day I found out, via email, that my professor will be coming to observe me next Tuesday morning. Hope I am ready.
At the end of the day I found out, via email, that my professor will be coming to observe me next Tuesday morning. Hope I am ready.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
First week is done
I made it through the first week of student teaching with only a couple of bumps and bruises. I was able to go through the schedule today, going from room to room, without looking at the printed schedule. I know the names of most of the students I will work with. And I'm starting to understand what my roll is in their school day. I do feel like the teaching part is not going to be a problem. The university assignments on the other hand are scaring me; progress monitoring, behavior management, assessments, writing an IEP.
Hopefully my co-operating teacher, Kelly, will be feeling better by Monday and will be able to come to school. I am ready for direction and instruction from her.
It was frustrating today, to watch the math lesson; three inches on a four inch line is not three fourths, it's three inches; seven inches on a ten inch line is not seven tenths, it's just seven inches. I don't feel it's my place to contradict the teacher, but I should have said something. The idea was to use the same length unit (a foot) and divide it into different sizes (halves, thirds, eighths) to show how the same size unit can be divided. That's going to have to be re-taught.
I think the worst part of the week was the two occasions when students flat out refused to do what I asked them to do. I will definately have to think about what I am going to do in the future as a student teacher and in my own classroom in these situations. I don't feel comfortable going to the student's regular teacher but that is what I did this week. I think doing that shows the students I'm not really in charge, and indicates to the teacher that I'm not capable of handling it. It undermines me. At this point I don't know what behavior management procedures are being used. I felt really frustrated and at a total loss when the students just plain said no and refused to budge when I gave them directions. From my last semester experience, I learned that it is not good to cottle the students and that is what one teacher has observed about new teachers she works with. I try to think, "how would I handle this situation with my own children." That doesn't always work because I can't yell at the students and I can't pick them up and carry them. Hmm, do I treat the student's with more respect than my own children?
I have concluded that the professors are teaching us how to have the most ideal classroom. What I noticed this week is, classrooms don't work like that. Student's don't sit and pay attention perfectly. Teachers don't teach perfectly, it's ok to not know it all. And classrooms don't run without glitches. I should strive for the ideal classroom but I shouldn't get too discouraged when things don't go perfectly. Even the seasoned teachers I have observed this week, have lost instructional time for one reason or another and students waste time.
Hopefully my co-operating teacher, Kelly, will be feeling better by Monday and will be able to come to school. I am ready for direction and instruction from her.
It was frustrating today, to watch the math lesson; three inches on a four inch line is not three fourths, it's three inches; seven inches on a ten inch line is not seven tenths, it's just seven inches. I don't feel it's my place to contradict the teacher, but I should have said something. The idea was to use the same length unit (a foot) and divide it into different sizes (halves, thirds, eighths) to show how the same size unit can be divided. That's going to have to be re-taught.
I think the worst part of the week was the two occasions when students flat out refused to do what I asked them to do. I will definately have to think about what I am going to do in the future as a student teacher and in my own classroom in these situations. I don't feel comfortable going to the student's regular teacher but that is what I did this week. I think doing that shows the students I'm not really in charge, and indicates to the teacher that I'm not capable of handling it. It undermines me. At this point I don't know what behavior management procedures are being used. I felt really frustrated and at a total loss when the students just plain said no and refused to budge when I gave them directions. From my last semester experience, I learned that it is not good to cottle the students and that is what one teacher has observed about new teachers she works with. I try to think, "how would I handle this situation with my own children." That doesn't always work because I can't yell at the students and I can't pick them up and carry them. Hmm, do I treat the student's with more respect than my own children?
I have concluded that the professors are teaching us how to have the most ideal classroom. What I noticed this week is, classrooms don't work like that. Student's don't sit and pay attention perfectly. Teachers don't teach perfectly, it's ok to not know it all. And classrooms don't run without glitches. I should strive for the ideal classroom but I shouldn't get too discouraged when things don't go perfectly. Even the seasoned teachers I have observed this week, have lost instructional time for one reason or another and students waste time.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
meet and greet
Today was my first day as a student teacher and the meet and greet didn't turn out so well. The regular teacher will be out all week. So I met the sub. The regular aide was out today. So I met the sub. So out of the three adults in the room, no one was familiar with the students! But everything turned out just fine. The students didn't test us much and were actually quite helpful. I saw a student from my last placement who transferred to Altoona just after Christmas. I also got to see and say hi to a couple of girls from church who are new to this country. I'm so glad I introduced myself to them Sunday.
From what I saw today, I anticipate behaviors from learned helplessness to oppositional behavior. Most of the students simply avoided the assignments. Especially if reading was involved. I can understand their not wanting to read. I hated reading until sometime after I had graduated from high school. It's still not the first thing I think of to do if I have some spare time, but I do look forward to reading when I hear about a good book.
I've decided I need to get to bed by 9:00 each evening to be at my best in the morning. Hopefully I can get myself to bed by then. Think the kids will go to bed by then too? I'll need to write down a schedule to see where all my responsibilities will fit before I know if I am just dreaming about the full night's sleep.
From what I saw today, I anticipate behaviors from learned helplessness to oppositional behavior. Most of the students simply avoided the assignments. Especially if reading was involved. I can understand their not wanting to read. I hated reading until sometime after I had graduated from high school. It's still not the first thing I think of to do if I have some spare time, but I do look forward to reading when I hear about a good book.
I've decided I need to get to bed by 9:00 each evening to be at my best in the morning. Hopefully I can get myself to bed by then. Think the kids will go to bed by then too? I'll need to write down a schedule to see where all my responsibilities will fit before I know if I am just dreaming about the full night's sleep.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
And it beings
My hope is that I will be able to set aside time at least once a week, but hopefully daily, for reflection on my semester as a student teacher.
Tomorrow is the first of two seminars required for the semester where I will learn about how to end my college career of six years and start my career as an educator. I'll learn about the PDP (professional development plan) which is now used in place of the credits teachers used to take to keep up their certification.
The PDP is a 4-5 year plan where I set a goal or two and then work on it and document that work and any progress until the fourth year. At that point I gather a committee to review my goal and progress reports. I'll have some say about who is on the committee, but I must choose from the predetermined list.
We will be instructed on portfolio 3 and have the opportunity to talk to principals about the interview process and what they look for on a resume. I will also find out who my supervising professor will be and meet with him/her for about 2 hours. There will be time for lunch and a couple of breaks. These seminars take the entire day.
I was talking to Nathan and Stephanie the other day about their past experiences with student teachers. They told me, "don't be scared. It's so obvious and so stupid for them to be scared." But I am scared. Not of the students necessarily, but of the critique from the professors. I hate the grade part of all this schooling. Like the possibility of a better grade is going to make my brain work better!
My first placement will be in a Learning Disabilities classroom with fifth and sixth graders. What are fifth and sixth graders supposed to be learning? I have never been placed in anything above the second grade! Hopefully my experience with my siblings, my children and my church callings with the youth will help out when it comes to disposition of fifth and sixth graders. This placement runs from Tuesday, January 26 until Thursday April1.
My second placement starts Monday April 5 and finishes Wednesday June 9. I will be in a general education classroom with fifth graders. Hopefully my experience with the students in my first placement will help with the experience with students in my second placement.
Two different schools. Two different districts. Less than 10 miles apart.
As of now, I don't really know how much homework (lesson planning) I will have. So I don't know what kind of schedule I will have as far as school, homework, and family time. And really I expect it to continually change as the semester goes along because as I take on more and more classroom responsibilities, I expect to have more and more homework. But I still in-vision being able to come home from "work" and fix dinner, spend time with the kids and go to bed at a decent hour. No more all nighters!
At the moment I am contemplating what to take to school for lunch for the next 16 weeks. I can't afford school lunch and I don't always have left overs that are conducive to a lunch bag. Sandwiches are going to get really boring.
Tomorrow is the first of two seminars required for the semester where I will learn about how to end my college career of six years and start my career as an educator. I'll learn about the PDP (professional development plan) which is now used in place of the credits teachers used to take to keep up their certification.
The PDP is a 4-5 year plan where I set a goal or two and then work on it and document that work and any progress until the fourth year. At that point I gather a committee to review my goal and progress reports. I'll have some say about who is on the committee, but I must choose from the predetermined list.
We will be instructed on portfolio 3 and have the opportunity to talk to principals about the interview process and what they look for on a resume. I will also find out who my supervising professor will be and meet with him/her for about 2 hours. There will be time for lunch and a couple of breaks. These seminars take the entire day.
I was talking to Nathan and Stephanie the other day about their past experiences with student teachers. They told me, "don't be scared. It's so obvious and so stupid for them to be scared." But I am scared. Not of the students necessarily, but of the critique from the professors. I hate the grade part of all this schooling. Like the possibility of a better grade is going to make my brain work better!
My first placement will be in a Learning Disabilities classroom with fifth and sixth graders. What are fifth and sixth graders supposed to be learning? I have never been placed in anything above the second grade! Hopefully my experience with my siblings, my children and my church callings with the youth will help out when it comes to disposition of fifth and sixth graders. This placement runs from Tuesday, January 26 until Thursday April1.
My second placement starts Monday April 5 and finishes Wednesday June 9. I will be in a general education classroom with fifth graders. Hopefully my experience with the students in my first placement will help with the experience with students in my second placement.
Two different schools. Two different districts. Less than 10 miles apart.
As of now, I don't really know how much homework (lesson planning) I will have. So I don't know what kind of schedule I will have as far as school, homework, and family time. And really I expect it to continually change as the semester goes along because as I take on more and more classroom responsibilities, I expect to have more and more homework. But I still in-vision being able to come home from "work" and fix dinner, spend time with the kids and go to bed at a decent hour. No more all nighters!
At the moment I am contemplating what to take to school for lunch for the next 16 weeks. I can't afford school lunch and I don't always have left overs that are conducive to a lunch bag. Sandwiches are going to get really boring.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Counting my blessings
It is now October 2009. Back in January, Paul petitioned the court for "a modification of maintenance" because of a "substantial change in circumstances." In other words, he doesn't think he should pay alimony because he lost the income from his second job.
I finally got the court orders today, "Now, Therefore, it is ordered that petitioner's motion is denied."
Becuase this is the decision of the de Novo hearing, meaning this is the second time we have been before the judge about this, it is final, end of story until I graduate/get a job. Graduation will hopefully be next May. (I won't really be finished until the public schools are finished in June because I will be student teaching.)
Paul's income from his primary job has increased since the divorce, and he is supporting one less child now than at the time of the divorce. When we were getting divorced I was not happy that the income from his second job nor any overtime from his primary job was "not relied upon when determining support and maintenance." Well, the judge used this information to determine that his circumstances haven't changed that much. "At the time of the divorce, the parties cosidered only the petitioner's D.o.J. income in calculating support and that continued to be the basis for revised support since. Paul's financial disclosure statement does not include income from his second job, only income from D.o.J. The settlement agreement which adopted the support and maintenance proposals were Paul's suggestions."
At the time of the final hearing I was not employed and was a full time student. This is still the case. Although Paul argues that I have time to work, the judge agrees with me that I am unavailable to work next semester because I will be student teaching. Paul also argued that I could rent the apartment for more money and not have Patrick living there for free. The judge didn't agree. "The rental income...is reasonable...it is reasonable that the ...parties' son...reside there rent free under the circumstances."
Paul also argued that I could start drawing money out of the retirement fund as of his 50th birthday-today, if I felt I needed money. "No information is provided to the court as to advantages /disadvantages in making withdrawls." Nothing definitive has been provided to the court to show tht the respondent is eligible to receive such benefits at this time and exactly in what amount. The judge believes Paul is speculating.
So, even though I felt it was not right that his overtime and second income was not included in the determination of support, and I had many sleepless nights, and cried many tears over this, it has proven to be a blessing. Thank you Heavenly Father.
Sometime our prayers are not answered in the way we want or at the time we want.
I finally got the court orders today, "Now, Therefore, it is ordered that petitioner's motion is denied."
Becuase this is the decision of the de Novo hearing, meaning this is the second time we have been before the judge about this, it is final, end of story until I graduate/get a job. Graduation will hopefully be next May. (I won't really be finished until the public schools are finished in June because I will be student teaching.)
Paul's income from his primary job has increased since the divorce, and he is supporting one less child now than at the time of the divorce. When we were getting divorced I was not happy that the income from his second job nor any overtime from his primary job was "not relied upon when determining support and maintenance." Well, the judge used this information to determine that his circumstances haven't changed that much. "At the time of the divorce, the parties cosidered only the petitioner's D.o.J. income in calculating support and that continued to be the basis for revised support since. Paul's financial disclosure statement does not include income from his second job, only income from D.o.J. The settlement agreement which adopted the support and maintenance proposals were Paul's suggestions."
At the time of the final hearing I was not employed and was a full time student. This is still the case. Although Paul argues that I have time to work, the judge agrees with me that I am unavailable to work next semester because I will be student teaching. Paul also argued that I could rent the apartment for more money and not have Patrick living there for free. The judge didn't agree. "The rental income...is reasonable...it is reasonable that the ...parties' son...reside there rent free under the circumstances."
Paul also argued that I could start drawing money out of the retirement fund as of his 50th birthday-today, if I felt I needed money. "No information is provided to the court as to advantages /disadvantages in making withdrawls." Nothing definitive has been provided to the court to show tht the respondent is eligible to receive such benefits at this time and exactly in what amount. The judge believes Paul is speculating.
So, even though I felt it was not right that his overtime and second income was not included in the determination of support, and I had many sleepless nights, and cried many tears over this, it has proven to be a blessing. Thank you Heavenly Father.
Sometime our prayers are not answered in the way we want or at the time we want.
Friday, April 10, 2009
Just venting
"Just because the judge says it, doesn't make it so." Per the divorce, It was ordered that I would not be responsible for the $22000 worth of taxes owed on the money Paul earned in Iraq. The order of the court is that Paul is to pay that and I am not to be held responsible for any of it. When my 2007 tax return was taken/intercepted to pay the taxes "WE" owe on the money he earned in Iraq, I called the IRS to explain that I am not responsible for that lein. I was told that because we filed a joint return for 2006 and we live in a community property state, I am just as responsible as Paul is until it is paid off, and "just because a judge says it, doesn't mean it's so. A divorce court judge can not over rule federal tax laws." The only recorse I have is to take Paul to court for contempt of court to try to get my money back. It will continue like this, any refunds I am eligible for going to pay the taxes, until the debt is paid in full! It will take YEARS for me to pay that off. My blood is boiling.
Friday, February 27, 2009
A seizure recorded
Stuart had another seizure tonight around midnight. He spent the day doing all the normal stuff, watching TV, playing video games and hanging out. He came back from a friends after playing the usual 2 hours of video games, took a shower and then lied down on the front room floor. He knew it was coming because as he went from the bathroom to the front room he said, "here it comes." I remember hearing him say that a couple of times before it got quiet. By the time I got around the corner his body was contorted and he was seizing. It was more of a stiff muscle seizure than the convulsing kind although he did convulse a little. Hmm, maybe not. No, I don't think there was any convulsing this time. His eyes were shut, he was face down with his head resting on his left arm, which was stretched out straight. He lifted his head a few times like a new born baby who is learning to hold it's head up. Then he started the snorting, drooling, heavy-rapid breathing. At this point his eyes were open but he wasn't responsive. I started wiping the sweat from his face and noticed a slight flintch when I touched him with the towel. This response got more and more pronounced the more he came out of this part of the seizure. He tried to get up off the floor in this semi-conscious state but his muscles were so taxed by this point that he fell back down to the floor. Then Stuart tried to get up by rolling over but only got as far as rolling to the side of his stomach before he seemed to loose consciousness again and he'd fall back down. At some point he was able to sit up, but was still only semi-conscious because he wasn't answering any questions, he was glassy eyed, and still snorting with the rapid breathing thing. He bit his tongue this time hard enough to make it bleed. Not a lot of blood but he won't be eating spicy foods for a few days. As he was sitting on the floor in his under ware, I draped a towel over his lap to cover his private parts. He kept picking up the towel and playing with it like he might be trying to cover himself like with a blanket, but the towel wasn't big enough, so he was confused. Maybe thinking, "what is wrong with this blanket?" Finally he started to answer questions, but he was also falling asleep sitting up. So I decided it might be safe to have him go downstairs to bed. NOT. My renter and i got him standing up, and it seemed like Stuart decided to sit in the chair, so we both let go of Stuart to move the headphones on the seat cushion. When we let go Stuart lost balance and control and ended up stumbling to the other side of the room and running into the table where he knocked the pictures to the floor. We tried to catch Stuart before he got to the table but we were too late, all we could do was guide him back to the chair, like you might help a drunk walk. He made it to the chair where he collapsed because his muscles are too weak to support him, and slept for the next 20 minutes still breathing heavy and rapid. Once in a while he would open his eyes, rub his face (it goes kind of numb when he bits his tongue) and go back to sleep.
After he woke up, or came out of it/came to, he decided to go to bed. At this point he was able to walk on his own and made it safely down the stairs. He repeats saying things like it's something important that he shouldn't forget. He has asked a couple of times in the past hour, "what happened?" or "was Andrew here?" (my renter was here to help) His muscles are starting to get very sore now. His tongue is swelling. I can tell because his speech is different, like he is trying to talk through his teeth with his mouth full.
Another six months before he can get his drivers license.
I wasn't as scared this time as I have been in the past. My biggest concern is that point when he is mobile but still only semi-conscious, when he headed for the chair but ended up on the other side of the room running into the table. During this point of the seizures, he has gotten up and headed for the highway, tripped over the curb while he was walking into the church, and almost hit an emergency person who was "2 inches from my face." Oh ya, and walked out of the house and down the block in his underware.
He'll be sore for about a week, be disappointed that he can't get his drivers license yet, and be more vigilant about taking his meds.
After he woke up, or came out of it/came to, he decided to go to bed. At this point he was able to walk on his own and made it safely down the stairs. He repeats saying things like it's something important that he shouldn't forget. He has asked a couple of times in the past hour, "what happened?" or "was Andrew here?" (my renter was here to help) His muscles are starting to get very sore now. His tongue is swelling. I can tell because his speech is different, like he is trying to talk through his teeth with his mouth full.
Another six months before he can get his drivers license.
I wasn't as scared this time as I have been in the past. My biggest concern is that point when he is mobile but still only semi-conscious, when he headed for the chair but ended up on the other side of the room running into the table. During this point of the seizures, he has gotten up and headed for the highway, tripped over the curb while he was walking into the church, and almost hit an emergency person who was "2 inches from my face." Oh ya, and walked out of the house and down the block in his underware.
He'll be sore for about a week, be disappointed that he can't get his drivers license yet, and be more vigilant about taking his meds.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Look what the cat drug in
I got up this morning and found a bird in my livingroom. It kept running into the window and the mirror. While I was trying to get the frozen window open, it flew to the front door and kept running into it. I was finally able to open the front door and coax it to fly toward it. By bird. I checked the house becuase I was sure one of the kids had left a door open. But there was nothing open. So there must be a hole somewhere big enough for a bird to fly through! No wonder it is so cold in this house!
Monday, December 8, 2008
Did anyone see what I saw
I was watching Elder Worthlin's funeral Saturday, while I waited for an email from my professor, and saw a familiar face in the choir! Right there in the front row, the first man next to the women is a kid, now a man, I went to school with. I had to get out my year books but I found him. Depending on the year book his name is either David or Lyle Allen. MTC people are real people!!! I saw him again last night at the First Presidency's Devotional, front row, fourth man from the women,
Then at the end of the funeral, when the First Presidency and 11 of the Quorum of the 12 line up at the door and shake hands as the family leaves, I saw the Prophet shaking hands with one man like my teenage kids do. LOL I almost expected to see them bump fists!!
When I got home from school today, Steph was being extra urgent about me getting the car unloaded. I thought she must have to go to work or she wanted the car. As I was bringing in my last load she said "there is an envelope on the table for you." My first thought was okay so the mail came and there is something for me, big deal. Then taking into account her urgency to get the car unloaded, and I had asked her if she was supposed to work, I got more curious about the envelope on the table. Then I feared it was something from the courts, something more about the kids, visitation, my support.....When I looked at the envelop all that was written on the outside was "Karren" and poking out was money but I couldn't tell how much. I thought $20.oo. I was wrong! It was 10 times that-$200.00. No name, just "Karren." The kids were here when the envelope was dropped off but were pre-occupied so they didn't see who it was. Looks like they tried to desguise their handwriting 'cause it's real squiggley, like a sencond grader's. Thank you someone.
Then at the end of the funeral, when the First Presidency and 11 of the Quorum of the 12 line up at the door and shake hands as the family leaves, I saw the Prophet shaking hands with one man like my teenage kids do. LOL I almost expected to see them bump fists!!
When I got home from school today, Steph was being extra urgent about me getting the car unloaded. I thought she must have to go to work or she wanted the car. As I was bringing in my last load she said "there is an envelope on the table for you." My first thought was okay so the mail came and there is something for me, big deal. Then taking into account her urgency to get the car unloaded, and I had asked her if she was supposed to work, I got more curious about the envelope on the table. Then I feared it was something from the courts, something more about the kids, visitation, my support.....When I looked at the envelop all that was written on the outside was "Karren" and poking out was money but I couldn't tell how much. I thought $20.oo. I was wrong! It was 10 times that-$200.00. No name, just "Karren." The kids were here when the envelope was dropped off but were pre-occupied so they didn't see who it was. Looks like they tried to desguise their handwriting 'cause it's real squiggley, like a sencond grader's. Thank you someone.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Science was better
Thanks for the suggestions Lori. I like the one about selecting a couple of students in the beginning of the lesson to gage student understanding of content so I can adjust accordingly early in the lesson.
I was really nervous about teaching the science lesson on Tuesday because all the students were doing was rubbing rocks together-for an hour!!! But it turned out really well. The students were engaged, excited, and active during the exploration phase of the lesson and attentive during the instruction phase. They had good questions that led perfectly into the next lesson. It was fun! My second science lesson, washing rocks, also went well.
However, my second Reading lesson and first Math lesson didn't go so well. I believe the content of the lessons is too easy, or in the case of the worksheet I typed, too hard. (Even though I took it right out of the teacher's edition) I should have used it as a whole class rhyming activity instead of an individual thing. But it is something I can bring out in a future lesson and do as a whole group activity. (maybe use "movie talk" where students answer as if in a silent movie-silent talking only)
I have either felt confident with the lesson or the classroom management. My goal is to have both lesson and classsroom management come togehter by the time I am done with this practicum. I think once the content of the lesson is up to the student's academic understanding I will half the battle one. I realize student behavior is not strictly based on a good lesson. But I feel that if they are interested they will be less likely to find other things to occupy their mind, hands, mouth, brains....
More to come as the practicum continues.
I was really nervous about teaching the science lesson on Tuesday because all the students were doing was rubbing rocks together-for an hour!!! But it turned out really well. The students were engaged, excited, and active during the exploration phase of the lesson and attentive during the instruction phase. They had good questions that led perfectly into the next lesson. It was fun! My second science lesson, washing rocks, also went well.
However, my second Reading lesson and first Math lesson didn't go so well. I believe the content of the lessons is too easy, or in the case of the worksheet I typed, too hard. (Even though I took it right out of the teacher's edition) I should have used it as a whole class rhyming activity instead of an individual thing. But it is something I can bring out in a future lesson and do as a whole group activity. (maybe use "movie talk" where students answer as if in a silent movie-silent talking only)
I have either felt confident with the lesson or the classroom management. My goal is to have both lesson and classsroom management come togehter by the time I am done with this practicum. I think once the content of the lesson is up to the student's academic understanding I will half the battle one. I realize student behavior is not strictly based on a good lesson. But I feel that if they are interested they will be less likely to find other things to occupy their mind, hands, mouth, brains....
More to come as the practicum continues.
Monday, November 10, 2008
HELP
This blog is mostly for those of you who have more experience in the classroom than I. Today I taught my first lesson this semester. Can you picture a crash and burn? The lesson was a review for them but I didn't know that so the students were bored. Any suggestions? What classroom management techniques have worked in your classroom? When they have gotten loud and out of control what have you done to bring them back? I teach science tomorrow, then reading on Wednesday and alternate like that until Friday. I'm sure glad my advising professor didn't decide to come observe today!!!
Now some good stuff. Last week I asked Patrick and Stuart to give me a blessing because my back hurt. It more than just hurt, it was debilitating. I had hesitated to ask them because they were both just ordained an Elder less than 6 months ago, and I felt they weren't experienced enough to "say the right thing" so I could get a good blessing. I kept getting the impression to ask them because it's predicated on Faith not Experience. So finally I exercised my faith, got the blessing and am better. The lesson for me was about faith. It doesn't matter how long they have had the priesthood-it's the same priesthood whether the man has had it for 50 years or 50 minutes.
Last question, are there actually any "papers" involved in the mission papers? Paper as in-made from tree pulp. Stuart is supposed to fill out some forms online.
Now some good stuff. Last week I asked Patrick and Stuart to give me a blessing because my back hurt. It more than just hurt, it was debilitating. I had hesitated to ask them because they were both just ordained an Elder less than 6 months ago, and I felt they weren't experienced enough to "say the right thing" so I could get a good blessing. I kept getting the impression to ask them because it's predicated on Faith not Experience. So finally I exercised my faith, got the blessing and am better. The lesson for me was about faith. It doesn't matter how long they have had the priesthood-it's the same priesthood whether the man has had it for 50 years or 50 minutes.
Last question, are there actually any "papers" involved in the mission papers? Paper as in-made from tree pulp. Stuart is supposed to fill out some forms online.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Time to de-stress
Guess the stress balancing school and life is getting to me. I was looking over my schedule for next semester and realized I am going to have a lot of spare time. I'll have one class Wednesday night, another class Monday mid-day and the last class can either be Wed. mid-day or Wed. afternoon befor the night class. That's it. seven credits! When I was explaining to the kids, and thinking outloud about this I asked, mostly to myself, what am I going to do with all my time. I feel like I'll have a lot of wasted time. I can't really work in the school because the day classes are mid-day and I can't schedule any of them closer together because they are only offered during one time slot. To which Stephanie said, "Maybe you can de-stress."
Sunday, September 28, 2008
Firsts
This was a weekend of firsts. Stephanie went on her first date! She went with one of her best friend's older brother's. (Brother to the friend she saw at BYU, Katie). A very nice, Utah-mormon family--not from Utah. It was a good date, one I hope she will hold as a standard for dates to come. Especially because I am sure she will date non-members. She seems to enjoy the idea that dating is for fun, "friends getting together to do something fun" not dating to find a steady partner. This could change as she dates more; or less and wants to date more. But for now she can enjoy having fun with friends. I wish I had understood the concept when I was her age. Poor Darrell.
Nathan was ordained President of the Deacon's quorum today. The past week was interesting to be able to guide him in choosing his counselors; to watch the process. "I don't think Joe and Timmy will get along if I chose them for my counselors." (They already DO NOT get along.)
Stuart was ordained an Elder and gave his first blessings the day before school started. The blessings he gave us were simple, basic, and tender. He cried more with each successive blessing as he felt and understood the promptings of the Spirit. Truthfully, expected the blessings to be very similar because of his inexperience. They were unique to each of us. (Oh, me of little faith.).
Nathan was ordained President of the Deacon's quorum today. The past week was interesting to be able to guide him in choosing his counselors; to watch the process. "I don't think Joe and Timmy will get along if I chose them for my counselors." (They already DO NOT get along.)
Stuart was ordained an Elder and gave his first blessings the day before school started. The blessings he gave us were simple, basic, and tender. He cried more with each successive blessing as he felt and understood the promptings of the Spirit. Truthfully, expected the blessings to be very similar because of his inexperience. They were unique to each of us. (Oh, me of little faith.).
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
AMBER ALERT!!!!!!
HAVE YOU SEEN ME?NAME: The Crazy Lady
FROM: Escondido, California
DATE MISSING: Monday, July 28 2008
LAST SEEN: "Utah Vacation"
DATE OF BIRTH: September 6
AGE: not too old and younger than her age
HEIGHT: taller than Leighann but shorter than Lynette
HAIR: brown
SEX: probably...she has four kids!
WEIGHT: none of your business...skinny...that is all you need to know
EYES: hazely green
DESCRIPTIVE FEATURES: Double jointed knees, pencil lead in eye brown, no ear piercings or any other bodily piercings (that I know of)
If you have any information or know where she might be please contact us immediately. She has been know to frequent other blogs, leaving comments but her specific whereabouts are unknown.
REWARD: A generous reward has been offered by her parents of salt, garden fresh vegetable, family group sheet and insect identification. If found blogging fresh homemade bread is included with the aforementioned reward.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
I was just thinking
This summer I had a chance to do some things I haven't been able to do in quite a long time. Seemed like forever!!! I planted a garden and did some sewing. These two activities made me think about when I had more time for these things...like when my kids were small...like when I wasn't in school. Then I thought about all my sisters and how they are living their lives right now. Although I felt, I know that what I am doing right now is the right thing for me. Aside from that, I could see how "back in the day I was raising my family" and they (my sisters) were going to school, I was finding all kinds of great recipes and doing all kinds of fun things with my kids, and my sisters were making meals from a box (remember the mac and cheese?) and going nowhere for any length of time. Now I cook meals from a box, or the kids do, we go nowhere for any length of time and my kids pretty much are on thier own. Meanwhile, my sisters are finding all kinds of great recipes and doing all kinds of fun things with their kids. Just something I have been thinking about. I can't wait to get back to having time to do some fun stuff.
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SWAT Team
The SWAT Team from the local PD did some training in the house down the street. All the officers lined up behind the first guy who was holding a sheild, and they all marched to the house and "raided" it. There was a picture of a very buff sweaty guy with a big rifle just inside the door of the SWAT van.
Stuart the leprachan
I think he got this at Lagoon
